Torah Pursuant party of three…

Good Morning friends,

This morning during my quiet time I came across this verse above and it struck a chord. As a Torah Pursuant whole Bible believer YHWH has done so very much for our little family. I want to reach out to those of you who only have one maybe two children at home that are learning this walk along side you. I see you and I am you, grab a coffee and let’s chat.

Now I know my husband and I are not the “Norm” when people think of Torah pursuant whole bible believers. Most people have an assumption that people that walk in our faith need to have lots of children or they aren’t honoring Elohim. We have been judged because we only have the one child at home. What people don’t know is there is a whole heartbreaking story as to why our son is the only child at home. But we don’t share it with everyone because even then we are judged by people we thought we were able to trust.

We came to the truth in Fall of 2019 just before the world went stupid over a bug. My son was 11 soon to be 12. We have struggled a lot with him. He has been diagnosed with ADHD and SPD. Those are Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder and Sensory Processing Disorder. Before we came to the truth we had him on medication to control him, because that is what we were told by the world to do. He had a couple of friends who he was able to spend time with after we pulled him out of school for good. It was great until it wasn’t.

You see … since our son is an only child he doesn’t have the ability to just go play outside. That is one thing we always felt shame over. He never had a sibling he could go adventure with. Over the last almost 5 years he has matured and so have his friends. His friends were all girls. So like any “normal” teenage boy he thought he liked one of them and then the other. After long talks and discussions he understood that he had to reign in his emotions and thoughts. We worked hard on training him to keep his thoughts captive and pray to Yah for direction. Have any of you experienced this? Where the only group of friends you son or daughter has is the opposite sex?

Sukkot of 2022 was our last one with our “local” fellowship. The judgement we felt as a family because we have a son and only him was unreal. The whispers said behind our backs when we would turn in for the night. Being told to not share anything from our families journey. I was with a group of people and I felt so very alone. Everything our son did was judged and complained about. It was just a very un happy Sukkot and it is supposed to be a joyous occasion where we rehears the wedding feast. We continued to “fellowship” until there was a falling out in November 2022. For the mental health of our son we chose to cut ties. The things he was being called and threatened with have been just too much for me to even fathom. And to be told it is us that were being the difficult ones and they were not to blame. It truly breaks my heart.

Spring 2023 we immersed ourselves in the word. My husband joined a discipleship stable with 12 other men. I reached out and started joining in women’s fellowship. But there was still something missing. So we decided we were going to go to a large Sukkot gathering. There were 100’s of people in attendance. We were able to form true bonds there. Our son was able to form a bond with a group of teens his age that is positive and uplifting. They don’t care that he can play the piano by ear with in 20 minutes of hearing a song. They encourage it. They don’t care that he likes to play race car video games because they do it to. The shift in his mental being has been refreshing. Another cool thing that happened during Sukkot and is still happening months after, is that people are complimenting my husband and I on raising such a well mannered, hard working young man.

YHWH has done a great work in our families life and continues to do so. We surrendered everything to the glory of Him and we are so happy we did. Do we get stressed out? Yes. Do we feel like we can’t go on? Yes. But we trust in HIS plans for us and we see the light shining in the darkness. We are stepping out of the darkness of judgement and discouragement into arms held wide to hug us and lift our whole family up. So if you are struggling with being a small family amongst those who have many, there is hope for you. There is a space for you. Just because you don’t fit at the first table to sit at doesn’t mean that the father doesn’t have a table ready for you. Keep praying, keep seeking and the right fit will come. This is your permission to cut away the dross so that the purity will reflect the Father.